$TRUMPTROLL is the memecoin we deserve. It's going to be huge. It's going to be the biggest. We're going to win so much you'll get tired of winning. Other coins? Losers. Very low energy. Built on Solana. Believe me.
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Four reasons, very simple, anyone can understand them. The other memecoins? They don't have these. Not even close. Sad!
We took the troll face. We took the Trump. We put them together. Other people would've stopped there. We didn't. We added stars. We added the flag. We added a chart that's going up. We added gold. So much gold.
Folks, the memes are incredible. People are saying — and I have very smart people telling me this — the memes are the greatest memes in the history of memes. Not since 2007 has there been memes like these.
We've signed an executive order. Effective immediately, the chart only does green candles. The red candles have been deported. They're going. They were never supposed to be here. Some people are upset, but they're losers, frankly.
We looked at all the chains. ALL of them. We picked the best one. Other chains? They were begging us. Begging. We said no. We picked Solana. Solana is winning. Solana is what winners pick. We picked Solana.
The Office of the Troll President has, on Day One, signed the following order: all candles, from this hour forward, will be green. Red candles will be required to identify themselves at the border of the chart. They will not be admitted.
$TRUMPTROLL is, per EO-9-A, the official memecoin of the Troll Administration. Other memecoins? They had their chance. They blew it. Sad. Believe me.
The Troll Administration spent zero minutes deliberating. Zero. The orders are below. Each one is the best order ever signed.
Effective immediately, all candles on the $TRUMPTROLL chart will be green. Red candles will be deported to a chain we are not going to name, but it rhymes with "Loserchain." Folks, it's going to be incredible.
Holders of $TRUMPTROLL are, henceforth, required to have diamond hands. We're sending out the diamonds in the mail. They're being inspected. They're the finest diamonds. The hands? The hands are great. We checked the hands.
A 25% tariff has been placed on all FOMO entering the United Memecoin Economy from late-comer markets. This is going to be a windfall. Tremendous. The tariff will be paid in $TRUMPTROLL. Believe me, they're going to pay.
A national, on-chain campaign. Hats, banners, billboards, pump-the-jam at 3am. We're spending zero dollars on this because the people are doing it themselves, organically. Organic is the best. Nobody does organic like we do.
Three secretaries have been appointed. The Secretary of Pumping. The Secretary of Memes. The Secretary of Diamond Hands. Their qualifications are perfect. We checked. Nobody has been more qualified, ever.
Each Secretary has issued a brief statement. They are all tremendous statements. Some are saying they are the greatest statements of all time. We are not contradicting those people.
"Folks, the mandate is +1,400%. That's the number. We didn't pick it. It picked us. We are going to deliver it. Some experts say it can't be done. Those experts? They have been let go. The new experts say it can. We agree with the new experts."
"The memes — and I want to be very clear about this — the memes are the greatest memes in the history of memes. Not even close. Other memes? They are looking at our memes and they are weeping. They are weeping into their JPEGs."
"The directive is: do not sell. Nobody. Not now, not ever. The selling has been suspended, in this administration, indefinitely. Some are calling this controversial. They are losers. The diamond hands have been certified by the finest jewelers. Believe me."
WE'RE GOING TO WIN.
WE'RE GOING TO WIN SO MUCH.
YOU'LL GET TIRED OF WINNING.
— THE TROLL PRESIDENT · MAY 12, 2026
Drop into Dexscreener. The hat travels with the assets. Folks, the assets are incredible. Some are saying they are the best assets ever. Believe me.
